Well… yesterday I put it all on the line and told my story. I even put in pictures of what I looked like at 199 lbs. From that post several people inferred that I didn’t love myself until I got thin. HELLOOOOO?????? I didn’t love myself at all until I took those steps to live a long, healthy, full life. Getting thin was a side effect of healthy living.
I cannot even believe the things that I’ve heard. That young, insecure people will read a story of immense change, that was so hard to do, and take away from that only that the it’s better to be thin. Umm…. what?! I’m NOT stick thin. I’m not even my medical ideal weight, about 20lbs heavier than that actually. I’ve got curves still and I’m happy with who I am.
My story is nothing like TV or magazines or anything else that tells young people that thin is what is good. No, in fact, my story is that taking care of your body with exercise and nutrition is loving yourself!!! I was thin my entire life with the exception of 10 years as an adult and that time after my divorce that I let myself go. Other than that, I was an ideal weight or smaller, and I HATED MYSELF COMPLETELY!!!!!
Also, Arthur came back into my life after I’d lost weight, that’s true but he met me & fell in love with me at 199lbs. He never has or never will care what I weigh. He came back into my life as a friend, hadn’t seen me, didn’t know I’d lost weight, or anything. He lived 795 miles away from me. Our friendship turned into something more, like it was before. We decided the distance didn’t matter. We loved each other. Period.
So, take it how you will. I’m happy, and I’ve decided that what you think doesn’t matter. I eat light, I exercise, I walk, I take the stairs, I move, and I love myself. The scale doesn’t matter if I’m not feeling healthy. Period.
Whew…. I feel better now…
Peace, <3, & :-]
Esther St.James 